Linda Fisherman, MA, M.F.T.

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How Does Anxiety Feel? What to Notice & What Therapy Can Do to Help  

Headlines report that people of every kind, from every background, are suffering from anxiety. Studies suggest that school children and CEOs alike, report a lack of productivity and positivity affected by their internal apprehension. Partners and parents too, share that their own anxiety is exacerbated by the effort of soothing the fears of those they love. 

What about you? Are you susceptible to persistent fear and worry? Perhaps you feel some degree of internal discomfort but struggle to pin down whether you actually have “a problem with anxiety.” You aren’t alone.

  • Do you have difficulty determining whether you're dealing with anxiety or simply the stress that accompanies everyday life and responsibility?

  • Are your job, relationships, and dreams negatively influenced by your attempts to control or avoid issues that bother you?

  • Do you wonder if the health troubles you experience are connected to anxiety?

  • Do you often feel helpless or blindsided by the way uncertainty or stress makes you feel?

If you answered "yes" to most of those questions, be gentle with yourself. Your concerns are totally normal. Though anxiety is a natural survival mechanism, feeling “stuck” anxiety is extremely common. Exploring your emotions is a good start to identifying what’s going on and how your daily functioning is impacted by fear or dread.

How Does Anxiety Feel Physically?

Discomfort is a Routine Experience

Do you experience any of these common anxiety symptoms often?

  • A choking sensation

  • light-headedness or dizziness

  • nausea, digestive trouble

  • restlessness or urge to fidget

  • head, neck, backache, or other recurring bodily pains

  • elevated respiration, shortness of breath

  • racing or irregular pulse

  • hot flashes or sweating

  • sleep disruption or insomnia

  • teeth grinding or tight jaw

  • shifts in libido

Preexisting Conditions are Exacerbated

Do you have a preexisting illness or disability? The strain of anxiety can intensify your current health problems too. This may create a cycle of distress that makes you feel worse. Maintaining your connection with a supportive healthcare team, including a mental healthcare professional, is important.

If anxiety affects your body, it may be time to consider counseling. Also, consider how it may be affecting your mind and emotions.

How Does Anxiety Feel Mentally & Emotionally? 

Relaxation May Feel Out of Reach

Anxiety often shows up as racing thoughts and nervous tension. These symptoms can compromise your ability to relax and sleep soundly. Slowing down and calming down may feel difficult, even impossible. If you aren’t careful, this can lead to unhealthy means of relaxation. Beware of any dependence on sleep aids or substances to relax.

You’re Stuck On High Alert

A perpetual sense that you need to be prepared for fight or flight is common in anxiety sufferers. It’s also exhausting. You may spend undue time fretting, planning, and controlling people or your environment to cope with fear or uncertainty. 

Worry Feels Like Important Work

Is worry like a job for you? Do you fear that not worrying makes you weak or vulnerable? It can fuel more anxiety to believe that staying hypervigilant ensures that bad things don’t happen to you. Rumination about disasters can become a preoccupation. Worse, it may become an obstacle to staying present and hopeful. 

Your Personal Progress Seems Stifled

Are you unable to deal with change or loss? Anxiety can feel like you’ve run into an emotional brick wall. You may feel ill-equipped or unable to focus on the changes you want to make in your life. If you have trouble focusing on meeting your personal needs, dating, or embarking on a new job search, anxiety may be the cause.

Disconnection is Your Coping Method

Are things that trigger your anxiety so uncomfortable that you distance yourself from reality? This way of coping can happen in a couple of ways:

  • You disconnect via depersonalization. You feel as though you were watching yourself in a movie.

  • You disconnect via derealization. You feel as though you, your environment, or the world isn't real.

If anxiety affects your mind and emotions, it may be time to consider counseling. Also, consider how it may be affecting your relationships.

How Does Anxiety Feel Relationally?

Social Discomfort

Do you worry that people can see how tense and upset you are and judge you? Anxiety can impact your self-esteem and confidence. Trying new things, developing friendships, or dating may not seem like options for you. You may feel so misunderstood, conspicuous, or undesirable that you withdraw from people or limit connections unproductively.

Relationship Strain

Because anxiety is often characterized by an intolerance of uncertainty, life with another individual can feel frightening. This can spell trouble in your closest connections. Issues with boundaries, fear of abandonment, and miscommunication may arise. An anxious need for control or constant reassurance can interfere with trust and closeness.

So, what is the key to relief and recovery from your anxiety?

Anxiety Counseling Makes A Difference 

While it's always true your mental health struggles are unique to you, it’s also true that there are some general supports and mental health tools that can provide relief. Improved self-awareness and compassionate, experienced counseling can help you shift the anxious thoughts and unhelpful perceptions getting in your way. Learn more about anxiety counseling today and contact me soon for a consultation.